I haven’t written in here for a few weeks, mostly because I feel like I’ve been the bitter version of myself rather than the happy-go-lucky gal. And when bitter Lindsay comes out it’s all passive aggressive inner ranting and raving. Nobody wants to read that or even be around it – not even me. But the one thing that always brings inner calm to my chaotic thoughts is writing them all out. So here I am, writing on the subject of time hoping it will help me sort through everything.
Recently, I’ve been on the receiving end of everyone around me being too busy to talk. Even to the point that family and friends I used to talk to on a daily basis I’m lucky to hear back from every couple of weeks, and only for just a few short minutes. Normally, I just get the response back that they don’t have enough time to accomplish everything that’s on their plate and that they are, “Sorry, can’t talk, too busy.” At first I was understanding and then after awhile I just became really restless about it all. I kept my thoughts to myself mainly because I felt it made me sound like a brat who just wanted attention. But really, in the end, I think I just feel extremely disconnected not only from my family and friends’ lives but like they’re disconnected from mine as well. What I feel is homesick, yet I am home. It’s an unsettling feeling so when I talked to Liz about it today she made me realize it’s not about wanting attention, it’s about wanting to be important enough in their life as much as they’re important and integral to my own life.
Here’s the simple truth: there is always time. In all of your free time, you will make time for those things you consider important or a priority in accomplishing. Whether it’s about accomplishing your first 5k or spending time with family/friends or even asking someone how things are going, there is always time if it is (or they are) important enough to you.