Today marks the end of my 7 day detox and I am feeling better than ever. I am rejuvenated, light-hearted, and genuinely happy. Although my goal in detoxing was to clean out the bad toxins in my body and not to lose weight, I did lose two pounds and it makes me feel GREAT about myself. The biggest lesson I learned during this experience is that you are what you eat. Before I started detoxing, my stomach was constantly bloated – probably due to my over-eating of pastas and sweets (duh). But detoxing has done a lot for my overall digestive health and although I am craving all those greasy, starchy foods I love so much (and more importantly, can actually eat this week), I’ve decided I’m going to slowly add new food groups to my diet to see how my body reacts. I’ve also thought about dedicating two days a week to being meatless days – where I stick to a detox diet those two days. I would say I’m pretty excited to eat meat this week and had every intention of buying some when I went on my weekly run to the grocery store. Instead, I ended up at the check out counter with all fresh vegetables, fruits, and bean-based meals. I feel proud. Detoxing combined with daily exercise has done so much for me just in one week, I can only imagine what I’ll feel like at the end of this month. Although being well is a goal I’m hoping to accomplish in the month of August, I truly feel like I’m changing my lifestyle as well. So exciting!!
Since my post yesterday, I’ve had time to think. I mentioned I was going to stop focusing on problems and start seeking solutions – positive thinking. And so, my solution to being well mentally is to start focusing on my spiritual connection with God. One of my 12 resolutions is to find a spiritual mentor; however, I don’t feel like I’m quite up to accomplishing that task yet. Nevertheless, I feel like finding my spiritual connection is so important to being well mentally that I can’t imagine going forward in this adventure without trying. For anyone who knows me well enough, I am pretty uncomfortable expressing my spiritual/religious side (publicly and privately). With that, I have two confessions: 1) I have not been to church in 5 years and 2) I have not prayed in 5 years. I know some will read this and judge me. I’m okay with that. I know it’s not because I don’t believe, because I do. But truth be told, I don’t know why it is so hard for me to sit alone and just open myself up to prayer. Or to listen to a sermon. Seriously, why does it make me so freaking uncomfortable? I don’t have the answer to that question, but I woke up this morning with a goal: to go to church. And I went . I feel like the pastor was speaking directly to me in his sermon and although he sort of lost me when he started talking about paranoid schizophrenia and manifesting grandiose delusions (really, I don’t know) the basic gist was about the two realities of the world. There is the every day, real-world reality we live in and then there is the spiritual and religious reality. He talked about how we become so wrapped up in the first reality that we often forget about the second, even though it’s just as important, or even more so, than the first. When we constantly live in the first reality, we ultimately forget about the second and somewhere along the way we lose ourselves. He said the biggest challenge we face is remembering to live in our spiritual reality. And boy is he right. I found his last statement to be the most comforting – that he also faces this struggle every day. I have always thought pastors are different creatures than ordinary citizens – they always seem so perfect and absolute in their beliefs. Knowing they are human too and that they face the same struggles I do….I don’t know, it’s just strangely comforting to me. I feel normal. I also feel inspired. And so my not-so-lofty goal (but really lofty goal for me) this week is to pray at least once and report back to Him at church next Sunday.